Thursday, February 7, 2008

The Thinking Pugilist

My son has been fighting again. Apparently the whole room was fighting, a sort of pre-school free for all, with my boy in the middle. Dishing out beatdowns and serving up some whoop-ass. I can accept that a room with 20+ preschoolers can get wild. When I was a substitute teacher I couldn't control a room of 13 year old girls, so I don't blame the teachers entirely. But when the whole room goes up in a pitched battle with Hot Wheels, Foam Blocks and fists flying...it might be time to look at root causes, possibly get additional staff or additional training. You shouldn't have to put the Pre-K 4 room on lockdown and send in additional staff in riot gear to control the situation. When I walked in there today, they ran out of time-out corners, so there were unhappy kids sitting alone in random spots. There were like 3 kids who weren't in trouble. My son wasn't one of them.

Later at home, I told Jonathan how upset that was that he was starting fights. Which based on what I could glean from him and his friends, he was. I tried to explain the difference between defending oneself and instigating. I also told him he was way too smart to start a fight during Free Dancing right in front of the teacher. Obviously he'll get caught and then he'll get in trouble both here with me and at school. I also expressed my frustration with him that we kept having this conversation, as he was too smart not to learn the lesson. My new threat - the complete distruction of something he loves the next time he picks a fight for no good reason.

He then spent the next three hours trying to determine what I would throw away. It was an obvious effort to weigh risk reward. I mean, if I am only throwing away an action figure...who cares! Instead I told him..."Who knows it could be your Spiderman suit or maybe your lightsabers. It could be anything. But whatever it is, will be gone forever." He kept asking, then he tried to tell me.."OK, the first thing will be this." He holds up a busted up Hot Wheel, missing a wheel and all chipped up. I laughed and reminded him that would be choosing.

Later, I heard him giving our cat an almost verbatim lecture based on the one I gave him. Only it was about the cat pooping in his toy room.

" Gary...I have had it. How many time do we have to have this conversation before you learn? Do you like being in trouble.....do you like it when I am mad at you..."

It kept going, complete with hand gestures and intonation. I had three thoughts at the time:

1) I could laugh
2) I could and probably should beat him
3) I should call for professional help since he may be smarter than me

I smiled and listened to the end of the lecture. I think I did a good job, he obviously listened. As for what I will throw away...I am seriously leaning towards the suit. It has to be devastating, because as of right now he could care less. The cowboy boots are still on the fridge and he just doesn't care. I hope he doesn't push me, I'll feel horrible doing it.

Am I a bastard?

1 comment:

Sandy said...

Don't you mean that he lectured Steve???