Two is So Much More Than One

I pride myself on being smarter than the average bear. Given my intellect, one would think I would have seen the pattern developing. I am not saying I would change anything, but perhaps it would have alleviated my occasional sense of shock and wonder at just how much work two kids can be.

Let me take the Reader back in time.

We'll start with a mid summer's night eve in the year 1995. Jill and I sat in our small apartment, looking at the claw marks on our second hand couch, and sniff testing piles of dirty laundry on the floor to see if our cat Rambo had pissed on them. We thought, maybe our cat was lonely. So we found Rambo a friend, and named him Smokey. What ensued was less a a tale of friendship, than a 4 year long Tom and Jerry episode with two cats chasing each other through the house at all hours of the night, knocking over, clawing up and urinating on twice as much stuff. The lesson, two is much, much more than simply two. And really in this instance, not that good of an idea.

Lets go to Spring of 1999. Our dog Alex, having eaten two additional second hand couches, countless undergarments, and one very large hole in our bed,(yes our bed) was becoming a marital strain. My wife theorizes that maybe all Alex needs a friend to keep her company while we are gone. Next thing I know, I am cleaning up T-Rex size piles of poo off my hardwood floors, going through 40 lbs bags of Dog Food on a regular basis and taking walks in sub-zero temperatures twice a day! Again the lesson, Two is so very much more than One.

Let's fast forward to fall of 2006. Our first child Jonathan was going on 4, life was starting to settle down. For some inexplicable reason, we start talking about a second child. Here we are in March of 2008, and our daughter Emma is here. I love my daughter, and I wouldn't trade her for the world. My point is, that we somehow continued to delude ourselves that one more of anything, doesn't really mean twice as more...it's exponentially more. Going to breakfast is an adventure. Sleep is a luxury. (I remember that every time I am up twice a night with Emma, then Jon comes in at 6:30 am wanting watch cartoons.) Running simple errands requires supplies and thorough mission planning. Getting baby sitters is at least 4 times as hard. We measure our days by feeding cycles and nap times, watching carefully for signs of melt downs, while trying to make sure Jonathan doesn't feel ignored. We work, we cook, we clean, we do the laundry, take care of the pets, play with the kids. By 10:00pm, we collapse and prepare to repeat.

Its 6:00am, and I hear Emma cooing through the nursery monitor. I walk into her room and look down on her in her crib. She flashes a huge toothless, gummy smile, wriggles and squeals in delight, then reaches out her arms for me to pick her up. Later that same day, Jonathan struggles with a word in one of his books, repeating the sounds over and over again until it suddenly clicks. He says the word out loud and you can hear the satisfaction and the joy of discovery in his voice and literally see it glowing in his face. He laughs out loud, amazed.

Two is so much more than Two. It's Exponential.