Hey Buddy...Nice Pole!!

All right, I'm going to write something that might piss my 4 readers off. I'm driving home last night, and I pass this house with an enormous flag pole in front. It was probably 50 ft tall, and clearly dwarfed the surrounding structures. Thankfully, it was flying the US flag on top, and the state flag underneath. Around here though, it could have been flying any number of flags including but not limited to Dale Earnhardt (your choice) , UK, OSU, or even the Stars and Bars. But I'm going on record here. Unless your house is a mayoral or governor's residence, or an official building, you don't need a flag pole that big.

I can understand wanting to fly Old Glory, that's what the standard 6 foot porch poles are for but you don't need a pole that can be seen 3 subdivisions over. Your house isn't Mt. Suribachi or Porch Chop Hill. Even if you are stuck in a Adjustable Rate Mortgage, I think its safe to assume you didn't give life or limb for your Contemporary Colonial. Besides, its already well within previously defined US territory, so we all know what country your 1/2 acre lot belongs to.

So then, why feel the need for such a strong statement? Are you are in fact, a closet communist? Cleverly hiding your Stalinist leanings beneath the looming shadow of your enormous metal pole, which also serves as a convenient radio tower so you can send secret messages back to the Kremlin. Are you just that kinda guy? The kind of guy who wakes up with Lee Greenwood blaring and sports a high-lighted mullet with stars and stripes underwear? I see that big Hummer (No not the H2...the Real Deal) parked in your driveway.....do you have the biggest TV on the block, the gas grill that rocks the most BTU's. Are you compensating? All that "Bigger" in your life to make up for something else perhaps???

I can't say. I don't even know who this person was, but as an American citizen, I just have to ask: Just because we can do something, does that mean we have to? Could we perhaps control ourselves, at times even be accused of being somewhat understated?

I know...I know....that's crazy talk.