A Vince Young Moment

As my Mother will tell you, I've been hurtin' for a while now. I've been hit pretty hard by how poorly we played this past weekend. The looming home opener on my mind kept me from sleeping last night. I decided, impulsively to go for a drive. I forgot my cell phone. Strange that I should have found myself on the Roebling Bridge, holding my season tickets.
Even stranger, the next thing I know, Marvin's there! He came with the Police, a Psychiatrist, a Negotiator and Mike Brown!

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"Your family is concerned about you. They were afraid you might do something rash. Put the tickets down, son." Mike smiled at me encouragingly.

Meanwhile, Marvin was screaming at me," YOU DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO!!"

Mike Brown, wrestled past the Police Line, and pleaded for me to please place my tickets on the ground. "Don't do anything rash!" he counselled.

"But Mike....Marvin..." I stammered, "I'm just so tired. It's been so long! I don't know if I can do it anymore! What happened to the O-line?"

As I said that, I sub consciously extended my arms, my tickets flapping in the late night breeze, dangling above the muddy waters of the Ohio.

"I won't even get face value for these....WHY...Oh God....Why did I commit to the seat license!"
Marvin laughed inappropriately, "If you are a fan, be a fan!"

And the laugh is what saved me. For there right next to me was Mike Brown. The whole time Mike had been creeping ever so closer, his pruney fingers ever so slowly getting closer and closer to the tickets. Distracted by the flashing lights and calming voice of the negotiator, I hadn't even seen him! Twelve hours later, it still creeps me out to think of how fast....how sneaky he was.
I stepped away and jerked the tickets back, just before they fell in his grasp!

"You dirtballs! You tried to take advantage of me.....AGAIN! You're not here to help!"

I stuffed the tickets back into my pocket and backed away. The Police quickly surrounded me. After a few nods of sympathy, and a brief conversation with the Negotiator, who offered be $30.00 for my two seats (he has friends in Memphis), I was released.

Marvin and Mike, of course, will chalk this whole incident up to a big misunderstanding. Which in a way it was, I mis-understood the direction the team was going in I guess. I'm still going to the game on Sunday, but I might watch it from behind my hands. I'm scared of what I might see. But I'm not unloading my tickets just yet. One things for sure, don't underestimate Mikey....he's sneaky-fast! He got us all once and he almost got me a second time last night!